It’s 9:30 in the morning and my math teacher is droning on about numbers or something - I don't know I wasn't really paying attention. She finally caught my attention by saying "you know, this formula is not correct because it is disproved by this 'pacific' example." Yes my dear friends, she said "pacific." Was she talking about the Pacific Ocean?
NO.
Was she making a reference to the Broadway show "South Pacific"
NO.
“So why would she say this?” You ask, scrunching your eyebrows together in deep thought.
Well … my teacher is a very southern lady and by ‘southern’ I mean annoying.
Why is it that people in the South, East Texas to be “specific” ( "I" say specific correctly cuz my momma woudda beat my ass) talk like jack asses?
Here are some of the words that my fellow neighbors say … that just might make me want to tape their mouth up with duct tape (and YES it is "duct" not "duck")
Ok, ok why am I so uptight? "Chill out" you say?
I might have let that little mistake slide … but about 10 min later she says "I don't know, 'supposably' that could work…"
At this point in time I am thinking to myself "YOU have a masters degree?"
Oh well, I must learn to live with the mispronunciation and just be content with sighing and muttering "dat foo don't know jack!"
Friday, September 22, 2006
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
Watch out Energizer bunny – you’ve met your match!
I know some of you are thinking to yourself “wow what an intriguing title, I must read more! This blog entry must be the best one yet!” and while this may be true, I must warn you that the following material may be offensive to some readers, and may contain material unsuitable for some of Chelsea’s “good” friends. See you were right! This IS going to be the best entry yet.
So the story goes like this . . . (dreamy flashback music plays)
Ben and I are walking down the romantic strip of concrete between the two ponds on the UTTyler campus. We stop at the deck area to do a little making out … I mean deep intellectual conversing, when all of a sudden we hear a “thump, thump, thump” in the distance. I push Ben quickly away and glance around nervously. I certainly did not want to be caught in deep conversation by the UTTyler rent a cops! Ben, more than slightly annoyed by our little interruption, looks around to see if he can spot the cause. We see, in the distance, a jogger. Ben and I breathe a sigh of relief, though we are a little flabbergasted by the fact that someone would willingly go jogging at 11:00 at night … or willingly go jogging at all. Relieved, we continue on with our conversation. All of a sudden, out of the corner of my eye, I see the same jogger jump on top of a 10 ft brick wall. He took a running start and then shimmied himself right over that brick wall. I was amazed, shocked and slightly impressed. Ben scoffed at such an outrageous thing while I made jokes about how “he” should try that, and that would be “hott”.
We decided to dismiss the whole incident to the jogger not wanting to climb the stairs.
“If I could jump over that wall, I would SO not take the stairs” I told Ben seriously/
“HAHAHAHAHAH” Ben says, equally as serious.
Both of us glance up to the wall and there we see the jogger. He is looking ominously at us. Friend or foe – this is the question he seems to be silently signaling to us. I quickly look away not wanting to gawk at this unexplained jogger, who uses the stealth of night as cover. He walks to the stair case and climbs halfway up in a rapid dark streak. He jumps over the stair case again and again, practicing his maneuvers. The sight was magnificent. He was hopping over different things time and again. We stood amazed at the acrobatics of this creature. Man or bunny? We couldn’t tell. All we know about this jumping jogger is that he seemed to keep going, and going, and going….
“I think it’s Batman.” I whispered to Ben
“No, he’s like the energizer bunny” Ben states “on crack … yeah or PCP… yes the PCP bunny, that’s what we will call our stranger”
So if any of you know the whereabouts of the mysterious PCP bunny please call *** *** ****.
I want him for my birthday party.
Thank you for your time.
So the story goes like this . . . (dreamy flashback music plays)
Ben and I are walking down the romantic strip of concrete between the two ponds on the UTTyler campus. We stop at the deck area to do a little making out … I mean deep intellectual conversing, when all of a sudden we hear a “thump, thump, thump” in the distance. I push Ben quickly away and glance around nervously. I certainly did not want to be caught in deep conversation by the UTTyler rent a cops! Ben, more than slightly annoyed by our little interruption, looks around to see if he can spot the cause. We see, in the distance, a jogger. Ben and I breathe a sigh of relief, though we are a little flabbergasted by the fact that someone would willingly go jogging at 11:00 at night … or willingly go jogging at all. Relieved, we continue on with our conversation. All of a sudden, out of the corner of my eye, I see the same jogger jump on top of a 10 ft brick wall. He took a running start and then shimmied himself right over that brick wall. I was amazed, shocked and slightly impressed. Ben scoffed at such an outrageous thing while I made jokes about how “he” should try that, and that would be “hott”.
We decided to dismiss the whole incident to the jogger not wanting to climb the stairs.
“If I could jump over that wall, I would SO not take the stairs” I told Ben seriously/
“HAHAHAHAHAH” Ben says, equally as serious.
Both of us glance up to the wall and there we see the jogger. He is looking ominously at us. Friend or foe – this is the question he seems to be silently signaling to us. I quickly look away not wanting to gawk at this unexplained jogger, who uses the stealth of night as cover. He walks to the stair case and climbs halfway up in a rapid dark streak. He jumps over the stair case again and again, practicing his maneuvers. The sight was magnificent. He was hopping over different things time and again. We stood amazed at the acrobatics of this creature. Man or bunny? We couldn’t tell. All we know about this jumping jogger is that he seemed to keep going, and going, and going….
“I think it’s Batman.” I whispered to Ben
“No, he’s like the energizer bunny” Ben states “on crack … yeah or PCP… yes the PCP bunny, that’s what we will call our stranger”
So if any of you know the whereabouts of the mysterious PCP bunny please call *** *** ****.
I want him for my birthday party.
Thank you for your time.
Sunday, September 03, 2006
The retards on Mythbusters…rock my world.
I seriously am devoted to that show. There are many great and magnificent things about the show that cannot go unnoticed.
First, the show is run by nerds and is for nerds. And as everyone knows I “heart” nerds.
These nerds, however, are not the normal pocket-protecting, sci-fi watching, William Shatner quoting nerds. These guys are “science” nerds. This means that along with all there other nerdy qualities, they also like to blow things up.
Secondly, the Mythbusters, or Adam and Jamie, as we aficionados like to call them, enjoy blowing things up. There is nothing better than danger, oh wait … there is … nerds in danger.
Third, Jamie is a ginger, and everyone knows that gingers are the spice of life. (No pun intended)
I think that the most important reason for loving Mythbusters is the bonding experience that comes along with watching the show. My friends and I will get together on random afternoons and we will be arguing about what to watch.
“Oh, oh, oh, turn it back Paula Dean is on” says Chelsea
“Nope, let’s watch the ever entertaining CNN” says Ben “I just love that Candy Crowley”
“I hate that fat cow” “look you just passed ‘Prison Break’” says Russell
“Hey” shouts Elizabeth, grabbing the remote, “LIFETIME!”
“porn” mutters Chris
“WHAT?” we all shout.
“Uh … sci-fi, I said SCI-FI!” Chris sputters.
“WAIT! I’ve got it!” Chelsea stands up triumphantly. “Let’s watch MYTHBUSTERS”
Everyone cheers and party balloons fall from the ceiling.
See, I told you… Mythbusters creates lifelong bonds and good friendships.
BEST FRIENDS FOREVER!
Thank you Adam and Jamie!
First, the show is run by nerds and is for nerds. And as everyone knows I “heart” nerds.
These nerds, however, are not the normal pocket-protecting, sci-fi watching, William Shatner quoting nerds. These guys are “science” nerds. This means that along with all there other nerdy qualities, they also like to blow things up.
Secondly, the Mythbusters, or Adam and Jamie, as we aficionados like to call them, enjoy blowing things up. There is nothing better than danger, oh wait … there is … nerds in danger.
Third, Jamie is a ginger, and everyone knows that gingers are the spice of life. (No pun intended)
I think that the most important reason for loving Mythbusters is the bonding experience that comes along with watching the show. My friends and I will get together on random afternoons and we will be arguing about what to watch.
“Oh, oh, oh, turn it back Paula Dean is on” says Chelsea
“Nope, let’s watch the ever entertaining CNN” says Ben “I just love that Candy Crowley”
“I hate that fat cow” “look you just passed ‘Prison Break’” says Russell
“Hey” shouts Elizabeth, grabbing the remote, “LIFETIME!”
“porn” mutters Chris
“WHAT?” we all shout.
“Uh … sci-fi, I said SCI-FI!” Chris sputters.
“WAIT! I’ve got it!” Chelsea stands up triumphantly. “Let’s watch MYTHBUSTERS”
Everyone cheers and party balloons fall from the ceiling.
See, I told you… Mythbusters creates lifelong bonds and good friendships.
BEST FRIENDS FOREVER!
Thank you Adam and Jamie!
I <3 nerds, and other stupid uses of the <3 symbol
How may people use the symbol <3? not as in "love" but as in the word "heart"? Unfortunately, countless number of people use this on a daily, hourly, every freakin minute. Now, there are several reasons this is stupid and I am going to list them, because I am just that cool.
1. <3 <----- this is NOT a word.
2. the word "heart" is not a verb. Therefore, you cannot say "I heart boys" or "I heart the color pink" or "I heart my breast implants".
3. After the 50th time you "heart" something, it gets REALLY old. If you "heart" something that much then why don't you just marry it.
There are many, MANY phrases that use the word "heart" or the symbol "<3" that bother me. But the phrase that I do not "heart" the most is .... "I <3 NERDS!"
Ok, we get it, we have seen in splashed across countless Old Navy Tees. Seriously, who REALLY "hearts" nerds? Who in there right mind would ever heart someone who looked like this or this?
That is all for today. I know that some of my most awesome friends use the word "heart" as a verb. I love you and I am not saying you are wrong ... but you are.
And I also know a lot of my friends are going to think I am totally awesome for writing this blog entry, because some of them do agree with me on this subject. But if you say to me: "Hey, I so 'heart' your blog entry" or "Chelsea! I 'heart' you for writing that, I could't agree more." Then, I am afraid I will have to stab you with my giant trusty fork.
"I SOOOOOOO heart that fork."
1. <3 <----- this is NOT a word.
2. the word "heart" is not a verb. Therefore, you cannot say "I heart boys" or "I heart the color pink" or "I heart my breast implants".
3. After the 50th time you "heart" something, it gets REALLY old. If you "heart" something that much then why don't you just marry it.
There are many, MANY phrases that use the word "heart" or the symbol "<3" that bother me. But the phrase that I do not "heart" the most is .... "I <3 NERDS!"
Ok, we get it, we have seen in splashed across countless Old Navy Tees. Seriously, who REALLY "hearts" nerds? Who in there right mind would ever heart someone who looked like this or this?
That is all for today. I know that some of my most awesome friends use the word "heart" as a verb. I love you and I am not saying you are wrong ... but you are.
And I also know a lot of my friends are going to think I am totally awesome for writing this blog entry, because some of them do agree with me on this subject. But if you say to me: "Hey, I so 'heart' your blog entry" or "Chelsea! I 'heart' you for writing that, I could't agree more." Then, I am afraid I will have to stab you with my giant trusty fork.
"I SOOOOOOO heart that fork."
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